Finding Mister Right
Posted By Miss Jocelyn Tzahala on March 10, 2008 | Category: God's Listening Ear, Homekeeping, In The Life Of A Country Girl, Ponder Me This, The Scriptures
When I posted my article on young ladies going to college I was surprised to see how many justified going, against their own personal beliefs, because they might meet Mister Right. Many replied with the fear and doubt of meeting a man if they didn’t put themselves out there. For me this was a foreign thought. I have always just had this trusting in the WORD that because my role as a woman was to be a helpmeet to a man, a mother of many, and a home-manager that He would bring the right man along in His own time. All I had to do was prepare and follow what the WORD told me.
After I received all the responses about going to college to get your MRS degree I start pondering about it. I started wondering, questioning Yehovah about the matter. A sudden fear come over me and I had a twisted feeling in my stomach. The thought came to me, “yeah LORD how am I going to meet him?“. After a few days of pondering on this I realized that I was taking the matter into my own hands and doubting the one who holds the whole world in His hands. I let satan use what I had wrote in encouragement to others against.
Because of others’ fears and doubts, in the fact that they are taking finding a husband into their own hands, I was too. I let my shield of faith fall, just a little, and Satan hit me with many flaming arrows. Arrows of fear of not finding Mister Right (which didn’t help my self-esteem). Arrows of distrust in Yehovah. Arrows of complete worry… Because I took my eyes off of Yeshua and His promise to women, to be fruitful and multiply. Just as Peter did in Matthew 14:29-31 I began to sink beneath the waves. He asked me “Such little trust! Why did you doubt?”.
The days I spent doubting could have been used in prayer for myself to become the woman I was designed to be and for my future Mister Right. Yesterday was gone, but what would I do with today, tomorrow, and everyday until it was time? Worry or trust? I had to make up my mind, bend at the knees, and pray. I had to stop and ask Yehovah to help me to put my faith and trust in Him. We are such fickle creatures, but He is always steady and true.
People put too much faith in themselves, in college, in the world. I don’t want to in the slightest. I need to stay away from negative people who do. I don’t want to allow myself to distrust Yehovah and take my life into my own hands. Instead I will continue to prepare to be a wife and mother, and read the Word to grow spiritually. I will do what I’m supposed to do, and let Yehovah do what He’s wills.
I trust in Him. I know He loves me and He knows what’s best. He knows my desire to have a husband to love and cherish. He knows this is my design… He gave it to me. I don’t want to be in doubt that He will complete me. The first commandment to man was to be fruitful and multiply, stated in Genesis 1:28. Yehovah also promises that He has plans for us to prosper as He tells us in Jeremiah 29:11. He has hope and a future for us. Why do I need to worry?
As of right now I know plenty of Godly gentleman who are within five years of age. I don’t know what Yehovah may have in His plans for me, but it is quite silly to believe because you, at whatever age, right now don’t know any of whom you would marry. When I really thought about how many gentleman I know and have met… there were quite a lot. Only within the last two years did He make any kind of way for me or my sisters to find suitable gentlemen. Something I would have never foreseen. You think about it. How many gentlemen do you know? I’m not talking about martial candidates, just guys you know. How many guy-friends do they have? How many will it take for you to find your Mister Right? Just one. You might not meet him until just the right time. Think about it.
As I’ve heard, many of you think the only way you’re going to meet anybody is by going to college? Well, I just had a lady email me this week. She found my blog, thought it was great, and decided to email. That could easily happen with a gentleman. In fact it has.
I know many of you are involved in all sorts of activities, communities, and have plenty circles of friends. There are plenty of ways to meet suitable gentlemen. Off the top of my head you could meet someone at…..
forums
blogs
homeschool events
church
friend’s brother
friend’s brother’s friend
the grocery store
doing business work
conventions
homeschool Co-op
balls and dances
There are endless ways to meet people. Endless ways, and Yehovah will provide a way for you to meet Mister Right….in His own time and as long as you are following HIS path and NOT YOURS. Besides, when was the last time you heard of a girl meeting him at college? in real life? in the movies?
If you are worried about finding and meeting someone to marry, don’t be. Guys this goes for you too! I know many who just haven’t found their gem, but don’t loose heart! Don’t let satan use your fears and doubts as a stronghold over your life, your decisions, and your faith.
Romans 5: 1-2
So, since we have come to be considered righteous by God because of our trust, let us continue to have shalom with God through our Lord, Yeshua the Messiah. Also through him and on the ground of our trust, we have gained access to this grace in which we stand; so let us boast about the hope of experiencing God’s glory.1 Corinthians 1: 9
God is trustworthy: it was he who called you into fellowship with his Son, Yeshua the Messiah, our Lord.
Comments
55 Responses to “Finding Mister Right”
Leave a Reply
Thank you for visiting my site! I hope that it has encouraged and challenged you in someway. Please be aware that my blog is not intended for any debatable purposes (honestly!!), though that's not to say admonishment (via the Scriptures in context) is not welcome. This is simply just a place for me to share what YHVH-God is convicting me of and showing me in my walk with Him. Please read "You're Judgmental" before commenting if the thought strikes you.
I have comments set for moderation and I reserve the right to deny or edit out comments if I feel it necessary. I will deny comments that go against the Scriptures. If you are going to refute what I say, please use a Scripture for each belief, in context.
Also note that if you do not use a valid email address your comment will not be published, no exceptions. Your email is only seen by me so that I might clear my website of spammers. You can read My Site, My Right for more on my site rules.
Wanna a place an image next to your comment? Get yourself a gravatar.
Please make sure you sign up for comment-notifications (below) to receive reply comments in your inbox as I do answer comments on the post thread. Thank you for commenting!
Shalom, welcome to A Pondering Heart. I hope you will be challenged by what you read here and it will cause you to search deeper and deeper into the Word of YAH. My name is Jocelyn Tzahala - I am a 19yo young woman, living in Latin America, seeking to be 'set apart as YHVH is set-apart". I want my faith to resemble that Avraham because in him YHVH found a man who would trust in him with everything and act upon his Word. My hope is that my life may be a sweet fragrance unto YHVH the MOST HIGH! HalleluYAH!
Sweet Miss Jocelyn,
What I have found in scripture is that it’s the man who finds the woman, not the woman who finds the man. ;O)
Proverbs 18:22, “Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD.”
As young women you do not need to worry about finding a husband, God has that all worked out for you. I had a long talk about this with Jess and I will write something for it at GGM. You’re right, it’s a matter of trusting in the Lord and having Faith that He will bring the right man a long in His time.
[Reply]
Keep trusting; stop worrying, and God will take care of the rest. As long as you are not sitting around being idle or out pursuing your own path or in sin, you are right where God has you to be.
He is God. Period. No one needs more than that to have His will in their life.
Wow… you are one smart cookie. I wish I had taken time to think about things when I was your age. I was smart, but not as strong as you girls are. Stay strong in the Lord. He is so faithful. We have no idea. If we were faithful 100% of the time, we could not even touch His Faithfulness. He does keep His promises. He *is* the same yesterday, today and forever.
Love you~
Mom
[Reply]
Usually I groan when I watch movies that advocate “being yourself” Bleck! I don’t want to be myself, but who God wants me to be, and if God wants me to be a young woman who does NOT go to college, then he will handle everything else, as well as the being found by Mr. Right. Don’t ask me where the whole “being yourself” thing came from. I come up with strange trains of thought.
If you are going to college just to find or attract a husband, then you are going for the wrong reasons! Not to mention if you are going to college for those reasons, then you are wasting a whole lot of money, time, and effort. Often times, too, when you are around people who are constantly chasing after boys, you might start chasing boys yourself. Then your school work suffers because of your various heartaches and romances.
I know a couple at my church, and the reason the gentleman noticed the woman, was because she didn’t chase after him like other girls did. She stood apart from others and was different.
I also like the idea of the man finding the woman, better than vice versa. Isn’t it more romantic that way?
Very good post, Jocelyn. I am so glad that you realized that your doubt and worry were the devils’ work. Often times, I forget that, and go on worrying until I nearly make myself sick! Isn’t always so nice to rest your cares upon the Lord?
Have a very bright, very cheerful day!
Eyebright
[Reply]
Dear Miss Jocelyn,
I completely agree that girls should not go to college to find a husband!!! Girls should not be purposely trying to find a husband at all. It is in God’s hands. He is more than able to bring couples together in His perfect timing.
I do however feel that not every girl needs to be married. I believe it is God’s will for some to marry and for some to remain single. 1 Corinthians 7 is a great chapter that talks about marriage and singleness. Many great missionary women never married and there is nothing wrong with that! They were able to devote themselves completely to serving the Lord.
Your sister in Christ,
Alyssa
[Reply]
Dear Sweet Jocelyn,
You are so right to stop worrying about finding Mr. Right. I think those girls who want to go to college to find a husband are very foolish. That is one expensive man they will be looking for! And what if they DON’T meet Mr. Right in college?! Then where will they go to find him?
We know several young ladies who were living at home, under their daddy’s roof, who hardly went ANYWHERE, who are now very happily married. One of them was 23, and serving the Lord in her home church. One day the Lord sent along a single young man who is a missionary to the Philippines. One week later they were married, lol. So you see? You don’t need to be planning even two years ahead. You might only need a week to plan. :o) It will happen in the Lord’s timing, and with the right man. Keep trusting.
[Reply]
I didn’t have to “find” my sweet husband of 18 years, God sent it to me. I think your Mother said it best, we can never out do God’s faithfulness. As long as you bloom where He has you planted you’ll do just fine.
Bless you.
[Reply]
I do agree that if God wants you to marry, then you are right, the right man will come, but that may not happen to every girl. No one but God knows what will happen in the future.
And just to set your mind at rest, no, I will not go to college to find a guy. I’ll go to further my mind. :)
Thanks for your comment. How’s Caleb? And how are you?
Love ya,
Kate
p.s. How can you tell the difference between me and the other Kate?
[Reply]
Wow!!
You are so right. I was actually thinking about this same topic the other day.
My parents are planing on me doing college online (which is perfectly fine) and having me have my own business online (instead of working somewhere). And I’m like how will be able to meet “him”? Am I am going to bes single all my life because of this? I believe even though I have those questions the Lord will still bring “him” into my life at the right time, the right place, and when the Lord thinks I have matured enough! I have a church were I could possibly meet “him.” Or even all those other ideas you said. I now God has “him” in mind for me no matter what!!
Thank you MJ!!
Love, Miss Elizabeth
[Reply]
Are you saying part of the Bible is not inspired by God? Paul wrote what he was inspired to write. Paul was single…are you saying that’s wrong? 2 Timothy 3:16-17, “All Scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness: That the man of God may be perfect, thoroughly furnished unto all good works.” All Scripture. Not some. Not part.
I would be very, very, hesitant to hold strongly to a belief that is not clearly stated in the Bible. God never said that everyone should marry.
In Genesis, it was necessary to be fruitful and multiply so that humans could fill and subdue the earth. Now, I’m not saying that people who marry shouldn’t still have children! I’m just saying that this shouldn’t be taken out of context and taken to mean that all girls should marry.
Do you look down on Godly single women who don’t marry? It may not be God’s will for them to marry and we should not judge them.
May God clearly show us His perfect truth,
Alyssa
[Reply]
P.S. I loved the “Weekly.” It is such a cool idea!!!
Love, Miss Elizabeth
[Reply]
I wonder if those young ladies ever considered that they might meet MR. WRONG at college. I did. I met a young man who swept me off my feet. I gave him much of my heart and my first kiss (thankfully, nothing more). My grades fell and I was sure I was supposed to marry him and be a missionary to Turkey with him.
Later I realized that I, in my blind “Love” and innocence had missed the fact that he was an alcoholic. He ended up being arrested and thrown into jail and kicked out of the college (it was a Christian college and had a no drinking policy).
I tried to continue the relationship with him long-distance,but thankfully God had something better for me and after about a year brought an old friend back into my life who became my husband!
I could have missed out on the real deal b/c I WAS pursuing my MRS. degree instead of trusting God to bring to me whatever He planned!
[Reply]
Thank you as this was timely towards my own concerns for my son even though he is only ten at the moment. We live in the middle of no where on a small farm with no real close neighbors. Homeschooling keeps him even more isolated and he has no desire to venture out into groups at this time.
No worries, though, just keep trusting the Lord and he will provide. Thanks for cheering me up.
[Reply]
Thanks for helping me out, Joci. You’re awesome.
Ok, here goes:
Blog URL (if you want it on the ad):http://www.guitardylan.com/
Text On Ad:Guitar Dylan
*Colours:I’ll let you choose
*Background Picture: ditto
Size – icon and/or banner:I’ll do a icon and size : Width=154px Height=154px
Dylianos
[Reply]
That was an awesome post, Jocelyn. You are totally right. We need to trust in the Lord to provide for us. I laughed at the “Besides when you watch movies about her meeting him is it always at college? That’s just silly.” part, because I was thinking the same thing! I kind of always thought those friendships never lasted.
Anyway, thanks for the encouraging post!
Love
~Nikki
[Reply]
It’s best to just stop looking and hand it ALL over to God. Honestly! If we are truly wanting the person that God has for us, He is most definitely capable of putting Mr. Right right in our path.
It’s only those that look in all the wrong places that get distracted and find Mr. Right Now instead.
For both my older sister and myself, it was very soon after we truly turned over the entire issue of men and the right husband over to God– as in EVERY ASPECT, EVERY WORRY, EVERY THOUGHT over to the Lord– and went on about our lives, that He introduced us to our future husbands! (plural as in her one husband and my one husband… just to clarify) ;-)
Love,
Marsha
PS Most of my friends met their spouse AFTER college or away from college. Only one of them married someone they met while IN college.
[Reply]
The verse you referred Alyssa is often used out of context. The verses before Paul talks about remaining single are about man and woman being married, and THEN he says “I speak this by permission, and not of commandment.”, which is him saying it’s not the Lord’s commandment or words. Those are Paul’s, a human’s, words. Not God’s. In the beginning God made woman to be the helpmeet. That is purpose and design. It is God’s plan for woman to marry.
I don’t believe in single woman being missionaries. I believe that if she is to go to another country, it will be with a man and she will be his helpmeet in that ministry. Just because many great women have done works for the Lord, doesn’t mean that was His plan for her.
The Bible says there is God’s acceptable will, his good will, and perfect will.
[Reply]
I can see your point. But I do not feel like I should push college entirely aside. That goes for staying at home too. I think that I should keep myself open to both paths, so there is nothing blocking me from following God’s will. If it is His will that I go to college, I should not have a mental barier blocking me from following Him. If it is His will that I not go to college, I cannot have a barier blocking me from that either.
There are times when I have a hard time trusting the Lord to find me a good husband, especially since I would not like most of the guys I know to be interested in me in that manner. Thank you for renewing my hope that a good man will find me wherever God sends me.
~AuthorElf
[Reply]
If you don’t mind me asking, where in the bible does it say that there is God’s acceptable will, his good will, and perfect will? Because I do not see that is does. I have been taught that God only has one will, and that is his perfect will. Everything that happens is in his will. That means that some girls will not get married. Thats ok!
As much as I would like it, there is no verse that says that every girl will find mr. Right.
Love you,
Kate
ps. as always, “If anything sounds judgmental, it isn’t. Try to think *a gentle tone is trying to be used here, but sometimes words are hard to use to express feeling with* :)
[Reply]
For the longest time we didn’t know any homeschooled kids who had courted and gotten married. Recently, one got married, one is engaged, and one is courting. All of them and their fiances/spouse are christians and are homeschooled. And guess what?! In each situation God brought them together. None of them ever went to college, and they all lived in completely different places in the US.
:-) I really liked your post! It’s really easy to worry about the future and stuff, but it’s so much better when we just stop worrying. (Though that can be pretty hard some times!) ;-)
[Reply]
No, I am not saying that every part of the Bible isn’t inspired by God, but I am saying that Paul says “this is not commandment. These are my words”.
I don’t think I stress enough the fact of our, woman’s, design when God breathed life into Eve’s body. Did God change our design since the beginning?
And, No, I don’t look down on women who aren’t married. I try not to look down on anyone. I am not perfect and I do not want to judge anyone. I know that every woman will not be married in this age, but I will still encourage marriage.
:)
[Reply]
Hello!
Yeah, at least LOL. :) So are you feeling any better?
Jessica
[Reply]
Ok, I just want to make sure of one thing.
Romans 12:2 states this:
Romans 12:2 (King James Version)
King James Version (KJV)
2And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.
Note that this does not say, “the good will of God,” “the acceptable will of God,” and “the perfect will of God,” as if they are different. Those words are adjectives. They are not saying God has three minds.
He has predestined us according to his ONE and perfect will.
Thats all I have to say. :)
Kate
[Reply]
I want to add (about my college story) that if I had been closer to home (college was an 8 hour drive from home) that I would have definitely had guidance from my parents that would have prevented the heart break that I put myself through.
When my mom met the young man I was “head over heels” for… she was not supportive and told me that she did not like him or feel comfortable at all. I think that I was in too deep already by the time I got this feedback from her. If I had that feedback when I first met him it would have been easier to step back and see clearly.
My mom was happy when he broke up with me over a year later! And she and my dad both were thrilled when Russ and I were married the next year after that.
I am not saying I support the idea of college, but IF I were to relive my life and still go to college it would be nearer home. I would be no further than 1 hour from my parents’ protection and even then, not until I was MUCH older, not 17 and probably not at all knowing what I know now.
[Reply]
Ohh thank you so much for that post ! I agree with you all the way! It is so nice to see that I am not the only one:) again thank you so much !
God bless
Your sister in Christ
Ellie
[Reply]
I agree with you. Although I’m still tenatively planning on college, I can’t say it’s because I want to meet a guy…I know plenty (and have healthy brother-sister relationships) with lots of guys from our church and homeschool group.
Our local college…I’m not sure I’d want to meet a guy there!
But, all the same, I catch myself wondering how I’m going to find a guy. Then one day I caught myself…*I* can’t find myself a guy anywhere. But, God most certaintly can.
Like a BarlowGirl song says, “Why are we scared if we trust God too much He will fail us?” (I Don’t Regret)
Very good and thought-provoking post!
In Christ,
Grace
[Reply]
‘ello,
Must make it quick, but I enjoyed reading your post, and was inspired to keep trusting the Lord more often in every single part of my life, for I am a great worrier, and not to be even deceived the slightest bit by our culture.
Thanks again,
Maggie
[Reply]
Wow! You know a lot of guys! LOL! I don’t really *know* any! I can recognize a few by sight though, like three, or so.
You know, I find it rather funny to think we all have to go to college when there are over 6.7 BILLION people in the world, about half of them men.
They are not all elegible! By no means! But still, when you compare that to the number of men at an average college, I just don’t get it.
What were we all told to do if we ever got lost in Wal-Mart? “Stand still!” and, if you’re old enough, “Go to the front desk!”.
I think we need to exercise the same rules in this case. LOL! Stand still, and rest our faith in the Ultimate Front Desk (God, who handles the universe). I’m basically repeating what you said. :P
Well, I have to agree with some of the others on one point though. I don’t think everyone is under an obligation to marry. It almost sounds as though you are contradicting yourself here. Trusting God completely to bring you a husband, yet still worrying not to pass him by? I don’t mean to sound critical or judgemental here, just voicing my thoughts. I really don’t think the Bible firmly says one way or another. So how can we load this on others?
I really want to get married someday, but maybe God has a different plan. There have been christian old maids, just as there have been christian single guys, all through history, and not always by any fault of their own.
I don’t think I’m making any sense, I’m WAAAAAAY past my bedtime. Two hours past! I’d better go now. LOL!
Heather
[Reply]
Dear sweet Jocelyn, what a wonderful post! I know this was something I thought of A LOT as a teenager/young adult. Some words of wisdom I’ve learned the hard way: Keep your eyes on Jesus and be persistent in pursuing “godliness”, being a kind and trustworthy “friend”, perfecting “love”, being a keeper of the home (the more proficient you become without children, the easier things will be later because you won’t have to learn the “daily tasks” of running a household (finances, budgeting, meal planning/prep, cleaning, hospitality, etc.) and can focus on other things God has planned for your – i.e. helpmeet, parenting, ministry, etc). Dear one, the Lord has someone VERY special for you. How wise of you to take every thought captive into obedience to Jesus Christ! Also, guard your heart with ALL diligence. Have you seen/heard/read Noelle and Joshua Goforth’s testimony? I’m assuming you’ve also read ‘Passion and Purity’ by Elisabeth Elliot?
BTW, thanks for stopping by and Happy *early* Blogversary!!! I will let you know when I start the giveaways (plural). Lord bless you!
Leinani
[Reply]
Well written. The spiritual maturity in your posts always surprises me.
[Reply]
Hello!
Amen my dear. My “non-christian” family would definetly say I needed to go out to college to meet guys. Yes I have met guys in class but I know NONE of them are Mr. Right.
I have also known, for several years now, I will NOT find Mr. Right out in the world. God will bring him to me, of course through my church.
Its hard for me because I want to find love but I just sit back and cross my hands over my lap and say ‘God. I am stupid if I think I can find him on my own.’
Does this make any sense?? :D
RYC:
I have to call soon huh? ;) I shall try to call either tomorrow night or wednesday night.
Love
Julia
[Reply]
Hey Jocelyn!
I LOVED your post! Right on girl! College is a place to get more education, not get a man. Though it has been done before. Everyone I know that has gone to college has come back pregnant, or they are in a bad relationship. But on the other hand, you could meet a good Christian guy, fall in love, get married, and live happily ever after. It just depends on what God has in store. But I agree, why try and plan your future when God has every little thing under control?!? ^_^
I wish I could of read your article. I’m sure you did a wonderful job on it! Do you have a link to it, or can you send it to me someway? ^_^
Have a blessed day,
Sarah
[Reply]
Hello MJ!
I’m so excited to be your SSA! Keep up the good work of reaching out to young girls. You are doing a wonderful job. I pray that God continues to do His good work through you. ^_^
Luv ya,
Your SSA!
[Reply]
Dear Miss Jocelyn,
You did a wonderful job on this post! I whole-heartedly agree with what you said. I shouldn’t ever worry about how I’ll meet Prince Charming, in God’s timing He will bring us together. I don’t want to try to orchestrate my life, I don’t want something God doesn’t want for me. I need to keep my eyes on Him and trust Him and know that He has my entire life planned out.
Have you looked at the Homeschool Lounge much (yes, I know it’s for the moms, but it’s just too neat to keep away from)? Momma posted a discussion in the “Homeschooling Girls” group asking how the mom’s met their husbands . . . and so far none have met at college. I’m planning on doing a blog post about the results sometime. :) Of course I’ll link to this post, it’s really good.
“Helping at Homeschool convention booths.” Have you finalized whether you will be going to the convention or not? We will be there. :D
I just sent you an email through our yahoo account. Please let me know if you get it. :)
May God Bless you dear friend!
- Miss Emily Rose -
[Reply]
Yep. :D I still am amazed that I have such good friends in places so far away! Thanks. :)
Jennifer
[Reply]
Well, I have been discussing some of these comments with my Mom, and going back and forth over the various issues mentioned. We had a really great discussion, but since I am not the sharpest knife in the drawer, I will leave her to comment about what we discussed.
RYC,
Thanks for the compliments on my blog and my pictures. We got the proofs for the professional pictures yesterday, and a lot of them are really good!
About homeschooling and the PSS, I say what you said, although sometimes I feel like I this high and mighty homeschooler looking down upon the PSS from my perch in the clouds. I don’t want to sound that way, it is just that I see something that is bad, and don’t want to be any part of it, then I tell people that, and they think that my reasons for not wanting to, or my just not wanting to, are stuck up.
*sigh* At times like those, I feel kind of Charlie Brownish.
[Reply]
Excellent post Jocelyn! I have enjoyed discussing it with my daughter Eyebright and we have discussed the numerous comments as well.
As for God’s good will, acceptable will, and perfect will – I don’t have to have three minds to have a good will, acceptable will, and perfect will for my own children. Obviously I would want the perfect will but that is not always possible.
To say that God only has a perfect will and that everything that happens is His perfect will is to say that God is now favorable of homosexual marriages, murder, abortion, and mayhem. That is not His perfect will. He allows it. If you say that all of this is within His perfect will then why does the Bible, God’s word, tell us that homosexuality is wrong and to punish murderers? That would make God a hypocrite for how can we go against His perfect will? God’s perfect will would have been to keep us in the garden of Eden. We stepped outside of that perfect will and God allowed us to do it. (This does not mean that I am saying we can no longer be in God’s perfect will now.) I am also not saying that sin cant’ be used to bring about God’s perfect will, but sin is never within that perfect will itself. Revelation is very clear on that point. I’m just pointing out that God can have different wills.
Of course I may have just opened up a whole other can of worms here depending on one’s theology. :)
Abiding in the Vine!
[Reply]
I think it is ridiculous to go to college for a husband! I think God will bring the right man along…and yes, although I’m sure there are many very nice men at colleges that could be right for you, that doesn’t mean you have to go to college to find them. College is about learning, not man-hunting. Hehe!
[Reply]
Hello. Sorry I havent gotten over to your blog sooner. I saw that you had left a very nice comment on my blog but I have been busy and neglected to come on over and check it out.
I am pretty impressed with your blog (while I am not clueless with a computer I am like a little baby when it comes to blogs haha) Haha sweet you like LOTR too!!!
Its pretty awesome that you have come to that conclusion about “Mr. Right” God will eventually bring him across your path in his timing, and as his perfect will directs. Of course that doesnt mean that if you arent “looking” he will just walk up to your home knock on the door and be like, “Hey I uh… just felt drawn here, and you will have one of those “movie moments”. Keep up with looking to God for guidance in everything in your life.
In Christ,
Jared Skitt
[Reply]
I’m all for people having faith and sometimes it’s all you have to pull you through the tough times. If fate (God, the church, faith or whatever) brings you Mr Right then that’s great.
However sometimes it’s necessary to help yourself. Your mind, body and spirit are gifts to be used in order to realise your purpose. My point is that sitting around relying upon Mr Right being delivered to you on a plate, basically puts the responsibility in someone elses hands.
Taking things into your own hands isn’t the same as not having faith in God. Get out there and find him girl! Perhaps God’s test for you isn’t about your faith in Him… but your faith in yourself. Have a think about it.
Blessings,
Adam
[Reply]
I just have to say first of all: I loved your post Jocelyn, and I have been very much blessed by reading all the comments, I do not agree with all, and therefore neither disagree with all.
And second; I’m not answering especially to any comment, I’m just thinking out loud…
I have a four year old cousin. When my uncle drives their car up the driveway, she always gets to sit in his lap holding, by herself, the steering wheel and turns as the road twists into their front yard. I’m in no doubt, that she thinks that she needs to help my uncle get his car up the driveway…
I think we often do that with God as well, I know I do. I mean, of course I know He’s almighty, that he created Heaven and Earth, and that all the stars were made by a breath from His mouth. But, sometimes, He just NEEDS my help.
I find myself thinking: Sorry Lord, but I really think I know better than you, here…
Ehm, or not..
Good luck on drawing closer to God and search for His will, because, if you search from all of your heart, you SHALL find Him =) =)
åslaugs last blog post..In His Presence
[Reply]
Hey, MJ!
I agree with this article; most of it anyway. I was wondering what you thought of Online College or Bible College. I have no idea what God wants me to do. I really wonder….Do you think it’s possible for God to want a lady to go to college? I’m kinda in the blue….My parents DO NOT want me to go to a regular college. Only a christian college or a online college.
~willow
[Reply]
Hey Miss Jocelyn,
What about missionary women? Some of them are single and they serve God. I don’t really see anything in the bible that says that women HAVE to get married and aren’t allowed to serve God by being a missionary unless they’re married.
If it sounds kind of rude, please do not take it that way; I am just curious.
Your sister in Christ,
Heidi Mae
[Reply]
Willow
I think an online college would be alright, but honestly once you finish your highschool you should start really preparing to be a wife, mother and homekeeper. If you want to learn a trade to use as a homebusiness than that is an excellent time to train for it.
I honestly don’t think God wants ladies out of the home, off at some college, Christian or not. A lot of the times Christian colleges are just as worldly as secular ones, save they teach creationism.
Heidi Mae
God’s purpose for woman, when He created her, was to be a helpmeet to a man and in order to do that she HAD to be married. It was God’s design that man should be fruitful and multiply – have children. All of these things point to God’s plan of marriage. It is the most precious union after the relationship man has with Him.
All through the Bible you will find directions to women about serving their husbands and keeping their homes. I don’t believe it is God’s design for unmarried women to be missionaries. If you have a verse to give as your bases for your beliefs I am interested in seeing them. I have many verses I could give you about the woman being the keeper of the home and the helpmeet.
Now, just because it was not God’s plan for women to be single and/or a missionary doesn’t mean He won’t use their work for good. Still that doesn’t mean it was the design or his prefect will.
If you would like to bring up 1 Corinthians 7 I have already commented about that, but I will say again the verses before Paul talks about remaining single are about man and woman being married, and THEN he says “I speak this by permission, and not of commandment.”, which is him saying it’s not the Lord’s commandment or words. Those are Paul’s, a human’s, words. Not God’s. In the beginning God made woman to be the helpmeet. That is purpose and design. It is God’s plan for woman to marry.
Our God-given design since the beginning have not changed. Only our culture and what we think. God is always the same and will remain so until the end.
[Reply]
Between the Lord and praying mommas like me with marriagable age sons, we got you covered dear girl. You and others like have nothing to worry about :) .
Blessings, Penny Raine
http://pennyraine.com/blog
Penny Raines last blog post..jalapenos
[Reply]
Jocelyn,
I am very impressed with your maturity. I am prayerful that God will enable me to raise my daughter (and sons) to be as Spirit-filled as you seem to be. I did not follow what I have NOW learned the Bible says about marriage…but it is my desire to raise my children to have a a Godly perspective on this subject. Waiting on Him and following His will is always best…He knows our future and only His plan is the BEST one. He can and often does use our ‘mistakes’ for good…but how much better would it be if we could do our best to follow Him from the start! I commend you and your parents on the testimony of your life to others.
Wendy Woerners last blog post..An article concerning Obama..
[Reply]
I love what you wrote and it’s true. We have such little faith in God and find ourselves panicking because we feel like God overlooks that area in our lives. I have found myself panicking several times and even joined some dating websites. I quickly deleted my membership when I realized it wasn’t God’s way of working. I’ve met several wonderful gentlemen already in Facebook and Blogs! God has already chosen who we will marry, it’s all just a matter of timing and that’s in his hands too!
Charlenes last blog post..A Call to Pray
[Reply]
Wow! That realy needs to get out there. Thanks Miss Jocelyn for all you do!
[Reply]
I will have to say that I am currently a college student, but the purpose of college is not to find “Mr. Right.” I must admit that I have heard stories and know people who met at college, but that was part of God’s plan for them. College is to be a means of learning more (hopefully in an area of personal interest) and one of the many ways that God can use to develop you into the person He wants you to be. Anything beyond that is part of God’s work in your personal life, and cannot be expected or anticipated.
Rachel Anns last blog post..Maundy Thursday and Good Friday
[Reply]
Thank you for this encouraging article. I’ve always been told that college is the right time to pursue a husband by my parents. But it’s not about “pursuing” a husband because that makes it sound as if I am going to college for the purpose of hunting down the right guy. It just doesn’t make sense. Instead, I will continue to put my trust and faith in the Lord and he will bring me my future husband in his own timing and in his own way.
.-= Paulina´s last blog ..Before You Meet Prince Charming =-.
[Reply]
I’ve been hit hard with the college question, and also worried about finding Mr. Right. It was only a few days ago that I realized that God can do whatever he wants in that area of my life, and that I do not have to get a MRS. Degree. Your list of ‘places to meet people’ was a great encouragement to me. One thing that helped me was reading an article in the last No Greater Joy magazine about that very topic. What I didn’t realize before was that my ten guy friends also have friends… and their mothers have friends who have sons… and even the old women who go to our church have grandsons, who also have cousins! The courtship pool is really not as small as you think. Just because you don’t meet someone in person the first time doesn’t mean that they don’t exist.
Thanks for the encouraging post!
.-= Anna´s last blog ..My first tag! About marriage and other things… =-.
[Reply]
Thanks for putting this post on Twitter again, even though you wrote it a while back. Since the last time I commented you about going to college, God’s been working on me and now I’m still trying to figure all of that out.
My parents aren’t too happy with the thought that I don’t know if I want to go to college, so I’m trying to talk to them about it more- but often it gets a bit frustrating.
My dad is one of those who say, “If you don’t go to college, how are you going to find a husband?” to which I responded, “How did you meet mom?- at church.” He laughed and said I was right on that one. So the discussion continues…
It’s funny how as I get older, it seems like I realize how more and more how little I know. I suppose God’ll make it all perfectly clear in His time.
And though it’s hard, I’m trusting him for it.
I’ve been reading alot about Biblical Womanhood, which is helping alot.
It’s hard though, because everytime I try to bring up the idea of Stay-At-Home Daughterhood, everyone takes it upon themselves to try to dissuade that thought pattern- these are the people at church, so it makes it hard.
I suppose I’m a little frustrated right now, but I know God’s working on me, so I’m going to trust Him that He’ll help me wade through all this information…
.-= Kirsten Erin´s last blog ..Skirting Around the Issue: Why I Wear A Skirt (Coming Soon) =-.
[Reply]
I love how strong in faith you are at such a “young” age.
I was a Christian but not as strong.
That said by the age of 19 I had given up on finding someone. I was in college and not looking but found that all most of the college boys were after was…well…not my mind. And then one day I sat by an older college boy totally by fluke. (Three years older than me, but I could tell he was “much older” and at that age he probably was). I have no doubt that God brought us together for a purpose. He was not a Christian (but is now!) but he was and is the kindest, sweetest, most loving person I know and he was searching (It took many years for him to be saved, but he was always open and questioning and seeking). I love him with every single ounce of my being.
I am always a little saddened when people won’t date someone who doesn’t know God, I understand the reasoning, but it makes me a little sad. Mike may not have known Him, but for sure HE knew Mike. Sometimes God uses us to help bring others to Him, and I am so blessed that God used me to help Mike know Him.
.-= Sheri´s last blog ..When the cats away… =-.
[Reply]
I am so glad He worked in your life in this area and His will prevailed! I understand you here on not dating an unbeliever, but we are commanded in 2 Corinthians 6:14 not do so for reasons stated in the verse.
[Reply]
This really spoke to me today. Not really with the college issue but regarding other things I have been doing lately to take control of this issue rather than leaving it in God’s more than capable hands. The Lord has, as of the last couple of days really been convicting me on this issue but I thought I had pretty much pushed those impressions from my mind/heart until I read this. Now, I know He means for me to turn this over to Him & not “rely on my own understanding.” Thanks.
.-= Kristy´s last blog .."The Opinion Of Women" =-.
[Reply]
I just discovered your blog this evening and I wanted to say that this post on Finding Mr. Right is excellent. It most certainly is not necessary to go off to college for the purpose of meeting guys. I love the list you included to encourage young ladies of ways that they can meet single guys where they are at.
My husband was 14 and I was 16 when we met for the very first time. We got to know each other through a speech club we were members of and became pretty good friends. I wasted a large portion of my high school years worrying about finding my “One True Love” and never would have guessed him to be the goofy 14 year old boy my sister and I carpooled with to speech club every Friday! He didn’t stay 14 forever (thank goodness! lol) and several months after he turned 17 he approached my dad requesting permission to “get to know me better.” We were married 3 years later and I love him so much!!! I laugh at my silliness in worrying about how I was ever going to find a husband.
I feel so sad for the young girls who worry so much about how they are going to meet a guy because I remember that feeling all too well. God’s plan is so much bigger than we can imagine. Young ladies don’t have to go out of their way (like going off to college) in order to meet guys…God is big enough and powerful enough that he can bring two people together when the timing is right.
I do not think it is necessarily wrong for a girl to go to college if she really believes that is God’s will for her during a particular season of life, but I completely disagree with the idea that college is “The Place” to meet men.
[Reply]