The Voice
Sometimes I find myself wishing I was some other kind of blogger…
a craft blogger
a photo-blogger
a homemade blogger
a giveaway (or a winner , whatever works!) blogger
… anything BUT the controversial blogger than I am.
Sometimes it really is hard playing my part in Yehovah’s plan and sharing what’s on my heart because I know I will lose friends or offend others. Sometimes I find myself blogging towards a certain aspect of blogging to be more favoured or just to avoid the topics I feel led to share about for fear of being laughed at or disowned otherwise. Did Noah feel the same way when building the ark? Knowing what Yehovah told him was the truth, yet having to daily put up with the scorn and mockery of others? It’s hard being transparent, sharing what’s on your heart, yet not opening yourself up to hurt and heartache.
I read through blogs of friends and see them getting along just fine with others with no odds between anyone, and wish it could be that way with everyone. I have lost many friends through my years of blogging and if you look at it from the outside you’d think I just had some kind of problem keeping friends. I will never turn a friend away because we disagree on certain beliefs or break fellowship with them, but rather be as iron sharpens iron and love as Yeshua did. Unfortunately this is not so with all believers, and I find incredibly shocking and hurtful. It is hard time after time after time when you think you found someone who will stick closer than a brother, only to find out that it was not so and Yehovah had a better plan for your life in that area. In the grand scheme of things I would go through all the hurt in the world to do as Yehovah pleases but it still is hurt and I still have to go through it.
WHY? Why am I do I have to be so… …. … set apart? Why can’t I just be “normal” and blend in with everyone? Why do I have to be so different and weird – even in comparison to the conservative, homeschooling, biblical families? I am reminded that many are chosen, few are called, and if those who are called with not answer it then no one will.
I’ve been pondering what to write for this all day since yesterday. I’ve been pondering many things lately and when I when I attempt to write them down they aren’t as I want them. I’ve had quite a time just writing out this post. Perhaps that is because Yehovah is just sharing things with me that he wants me to just keep to myself until his appointed time that I share with others. I don’t want to hide my light under a bushel or let satan snuff it out but I don’t want to burn anyone either. It’s a fine line I’ve been struggling with, maybe just in my mind, on balancing passion, truth, and love. If you don’t get the right amount of each you may end up with something on your hands you never imagined. I have just wait on Yehovah to guide me so I don’t offer vinegar instead of sweet honey of his Scriptures. There is never a time when stopping to listen to his voice isn’t the best and most affective way to reach someone – no matter what the topic or who the person.
Psalms 29
1 A psalm of David: Give ADONAI his due, you who are godly; give ADONAI his due of glory and strength; 2 give ADONAI the glory due his name; worship ADONAI in holy splendor. 3 The voice of ADONAI is over the waters; the God of glory thunders, ADONAI over rushing waters, 4 the voice of ADONAI in power, the voice of ADONAI in splendor. 5 The voice of ADONAI cracks the cedars; ADONAI splinters the cedars of the L’vanon 6 and makes the L’vanon skip like a calf, Siryon like a young wild ox. 7 The voice of ADONAI flashes fiery flames; 8 the voice of ADONAI rocks the desert, ADONAI convulses the Kadesh Desert. 9 The voice of ADONAI causes deer to give birth and strips the forests bare -while in his temple, all cry, “Glory!” 10 ADONAI sits enthroned above the flood! ADONAI sits enthroned as king forever! 11 May ADONAI give strength to his people! May ADONAI bless his people with shalom!
David knew the power of Yehovah’s voice, and while Yehovah’s voice is like flashes of flames or full of splendor sometimes to hear it we have to be still and quiet. It’s easy to say, but to do that is something different. We have to lay prostrate before him and wait for his instruction. Oh how I long to do that. Perhaps I have some things to work out in my practices or beliefs but I am searching, seeking, Yehovah and pray that his voice is what people hear, not mine.
28 Comments | Rules of Engagement | What Are You Talking About??
Posted By Miss Jocelyn Tzahala on October 24, 2009 | Category: Saturday Psalm & Praise
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28 Responses to “The Voice”
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Thank you for visiting my site! I hope that it has encouraged and challenged you in someway. Please be aware that my blog is not intended for any debatable purposes (honestly!!), though that's not to say I'm not open to be shown the error of my ways via the Scriptures. This is simply just a place for me to share what Yahveh-God is convicting me of and showing me in my walk with Him. Please read "You're Judgmental" before commenting if the thought strikes you.
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Welcome to A Pondering Heart. Blessings to you in your visit here! This site is owned by a 18yo young lady, Miss Jocelyn who is striving to please Yahweh in everything she does. She is the second eldest daughter of two wonderful parents, sister to seven siblings, and "momma" to beautiful Nubian goats. Currently completing her education and serving Yahweh until she further serves him in marriage and motherhood. In hopes she might encourage ladies in a Scriptural-worldview she shares about her daily life, beliefs, and heart’s ponderings. Here you will find stories from life on the homestead, encouragement, the Scriptures, photography, reviews, giveaways, memes, and much more!
I love you and am thankful that you have the courage to be exactly who G-D created you to be. Speak out!!!!
.-= Auntie Christina´s last blog ..Good-Bye 30’s! =-.
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That’s really thought-provoking, Jocelyn. And very honorable. Thanks for posting- I feel the same way sometimes! I’ll pray for you, m’dear! <3
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:) I admire you Jocelyn, you are such a beautiful person inside and out. I want you to know that no matter what I won’t disown you or think bad of you. I think we all disagree about certain things, but if we all agreed how then could we really be a witness to someone/each other? :). Stand up for what you believe! I think that even if you were to lose all your friends, you should still stand firm in what you believe in. And no matter what you have God as your friend AND me! ;)
God Bless You!
Miss. Kinsey
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Wow! I could have written the exact same post! I have felt really like this since I was a young child. I’m 43 now and it isn’t getting better in some ways, but the closeness to Him is worth it. I am blessed to have a Husband with which I can share my feelings with. But still many times sense that only God understands me. I feel like most of my friends at church are just on surface level because I am too “intense” for them. I too, struggle with blogging. I feel so much that He puts on my heart, but fear the consequences of putting my thoughts and my heart into the blogosphere. I too am usually called “legalistic”, but I feel so frustrated because desiring God’s best should not be labeled as a bad thing. (It’s not legalism because we’re not depending on our own compliance for our salvation!) I don’t have any advice to give, but just wanted to say “me too” and keep listening to God’s call on your heart. You are a very special young woman. Most of the time I agree with you, but I don’t feel the need to have to agree with anyone (but God) 100%! :-) Keep writing. I miss you!
.-= Theresa´s last blog ..I Don’t Want To Be A Casual Christian =-.
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Jocelyn,
It is so hard to not be concerned about what others think. It is interesting that you posted this because this is exactly what was on my heart this morning when I prayed. I asked the Lord to free me from desiring the praise of men, their approval and their acknowledgment and care only to desire the praise of God.
That is also what was on my heart to pray about in regards to the new website I have been working on. I had spent a considerable amount of time recently “fretting” about what I should include.
But then I had read John chapter 5 with the children yesterday and verses41-44 kept piercing my heart. It wasn’t until this morning, though that I was brought to the point of repentance and submission.
To only desire the praise of God is the highest goal we could ever have, next to desiring God Himself!
Dear Jocelyn, just keep on drawing near to Him, He will not steer you wrong!
Love in Christ,
Michelle
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Miss Jocelyn, you ALWAYS inspire me, I always look forward to your postings. I subscribe through Google Reader, which, in case you don’t know, will list “blog ABC”, 3 messages; “blog DEF”, 1 message. With others, I will read the “headline” for each post, and frequently simply delete it. WITH YOURS I always, ALWAYS, will click on it to read it. Yes, you are set apart, you DO bring wisdom to us. Even when you say something that I do not necessarily agree with, I still benefit from it and am inspired by you. Take heart, do not despair, know that I always look forward to hearing from you! Bless you!
Ann, 42, WA State
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“I have given them thy word; and the world has hated them because they are not of the world, even as I am not of the world. I do not pray that thou shouldst take them out of the world, but that thou shouldst keep them from the evil one. They are not of the world, even as I am not of the world. Sanctify them in the truth; thy word is truth. As thou didst send me into the world, so I have sent them into the world. And for their sake I consecrate myself, that they also may be consecrated in truth.
“I do not pray for these only, but also for those who believe in me through their word, that they may all be one; even as thou, Father, art in me, and I in thee, that they also may be in us, so that the world may believe that thou hast sent me.The glory which thou has given me I have given to them, that they may be one even as we are one, I in them and thou in me, that they may become perfectly one, so that the world may know that thou hast sent me and hast loved them even as thou hast loved me.”
John 17:14-23
.-= Sylvia´s last blog ..The Advantages of Skirts =-.
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Not much to say, except I’m praying for ya!
When I write a post about faith, I always check my motives to see what they are before posting. Does it say what I believe and what God has laid on my heart? Am I writing the post because of a recent upsetting event (ie hurt feelings)? Am I trying to force someone else to believe what I believe?
If the answers to these questions are the proper ones, then you can’t help if conviction about something you write makes someone angry. You just have to make sure your motives are the right ones… God will take care of the rest!
(((HUGS)))
Sallie
.-= Sallie´s last blog ..I found new holiday decorating inspiration!! =-.
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I have been enjoying your blog. I like you are in the same position. I personally am torn on many levels regarding blogging. I realize this comment is no help to you (lol) but I wanted you know that you are certainly not alone. :)
.-= AnabaptistMama´s last blog ..Type 1-Juvenile Diabetes =-.
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You know, I feel exactly the same way. I too have gone through a good number of friends in the few years I have been blogging (and for years before that :P), because they disagreed with some stand that I took on something… I know what you mean completely. Wow… funny how I can COMPLETELY relate with this post- that doesn’t happen often for me with any one’s posts. :) Being set apart can be looked upon both as a gift, and a curse… depending on your mood (mine switches by turns.) I know that I was set apart from a very little girl- for so many reasons. But sometimes I can get tired of it, and wish I were just another ‘teenager’ without a conscience, just so that God would quit pricking it. Of course, once Chosen to be set apart, there is no going back… It’s amazing that we were thinking and feeling the same things close to the same time.
.-= Lizzy Brown´s last blog ..After much thought… (Part 2: Reading the high notes) =-.
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An excellent post, dear sister!! You are an encouragement to me and though I admit that I do not *always* agree with you, that is prone to happen among the best of friends and I pray that we may be friends for many years to come! (I usually do agree with you though!) I value your friendship very much indeed! :)
To the KING be all the glory!
Love,
Rebekah
“Be diligent to present yourself approved to God as a workman who does not need to be ashamed, accurately handling the word of truth.” 2 Timothy 2:15
.-= Rebekah´s last blog ..First Timothy 2:8 =-.
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Don’t give up Joc, keep on doing what ADONAI is calling you to do. Yes it is hard, there are many who have lost friends because of what they believe. But He will bless you and bless you and bless you.
blessings
Trish
.-= Trish´s last blog ..Just a few random thoughts =-.
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Awww… Jocelyn! (HUGS) Sometimes it is hard being a part of Yehovah’s plan, but I believe He has a purpose for each and every blog that is surrendered to Him. I know He has used yours (and continues to) to speak to other people in various ways. I know this because He has spoken to me through it.
Blessings and Shalom,
Hannah
.-= Hannah´s last blog ..Another Big Announcement *revised* =-.
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You know dear sweet one, God will bless and comfort you during this time. Is it not better to have Jesus as your friend than someone who is ‘not a true friend’ but pretending to be a friend? Sometimes God lets us experience these times as lessons – don’t give our hearts to others when it should be given to God.
Sometimes, yes, we are given blessed friends as in David and Jonathans case however it is when we choose God over even friendship and good standing that He will be able to use you most efficiently.
I’ve never had a close friendship EVER. I desired it yes, from early on in my life – prayed many nights – shed many tears – but nothing came my way- I was always ‘burned’ – this saddened me and hardened me. Through my journey God blessed me with the most grand friend of all – this friend came to me during a very difficult time in my life – he showed me Jesus is my Forever Friend – and that without knowing my desire for a close friendship.
I ended up writing him for over a year developing a strong friendship and trust yet all the while Jesus was in the midst. My friend is now my husband of 15 years and I would not trade what God has given me now for those ‘hard’ years of ‘friendlessness’.
It is truly a blessing to say that my husband is my best friend.
God bless you sweet child and keep surrendering your heart and will to your Saviour-Comforter-and Friend.
:)
.-= sara´s last blog ..Rain Comes to Sacramento! =-.
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Dear Jocelyn ~
May I offer another’s words as a ‘balm in Gilead’?
grateful for His workmanship, HveHope
~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥
Painfully Pleasant: The Paradox of Following Christ
Bitter-sweet
Ah, my dear angry Lord,
Since thou dost love, yet strike;
Cast down, yet help afford;
Sure I will do the like.
I will complain, yet praise;
I will bewail, approve;
And all my sour-sweet days
I will lament and love.
I bought The Complete English Works of George Herbert recently, hoping to add a little more poetry and devotion to my reading list. Not 10 minutes after laying my hands on it I read “Bitter-sweet” and knew I would not be disappointed. I’m tempted to say these are the best 8 lines of English poetry I know of. (I’ve also discovered that John Piper quotes this poem in When the Darkness Will Not Lift (PDF), pg. 78.)
Posted: 25 Oct 2009
(Author: Tyler Kenney)
dgblog@desiringgod.org
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I feel that way a lot as well. Before, when I was a food blogger I didn’t get any negative comments. But now as a different writer who shares her heart with the world, I am beginning to experience negativity and even cruel words from those who do not agree with my beliefs. It’s a hard journey on this narrow path, but I have to keep pressing for the goal!
May Yehovah bless you for the work you do Jocelyn! I really enjoy your blog and am glad that we can be friends :)
.-= Paulina´s last blog ..Saturday Psalm and Praise: Psalms 119 =-.
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In life’s seasons of friendships, God brings people into your path for temporary seasons. At one time, a friend may be their to provide nourishment, or another, for you to rest on. They are all part of His plan. We must keep our eyes on the road ahead(which is difficult), and keep following his plan.
Just remember “What a friend we have in Jesus”. He will always be watching you as you follow his path. His…way…is…the…best…way!!!
Hugs~
Your friend,
Tori L.
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Wow, Joc! Praying for you!
Always remember that trials bring growth, just like Ron Hamilton says in his hymn, O Rejoice In The LORD. :) And like James says “Let patience have her perfect work….”
Blessings to you, sister in Christ!
Because HE is Good, Tessa
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Sweetheart, you are still so young and have such a tough job for one so young. You emphatically, enthusiastically and in an exacting manner type and speak out what you feel God is asking you to do.
A favorite quote of mine is from St. Francis of Assisi: Preach the Gospel at all times, when necessary use words.
I really think that sums up what we, as Christians, need to do. Let go and Let God (Another quote! LOL) One of the coolest things about God is how he calls us to do different things. Not everybody on earth can be witnessed to in the same manner. Some are turned off by timidity while others are turned off by emphatic words.
Whatever God calls one to do does not make any one Christian better or stronger than another. As long as you are doing what God asks you are doing what’s right.
.-= Sheri´s last blog ..Tower of Babel =-.
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I commend you for sharing what He lays on your heart. Many times, I wish God spoke to me that way and that He’d use me in mighty ways like that, thinking that maybe I’m not working hard enough for Him if no one is fighting against me like they do with you and others know. I think with me, God works in quiet ways, not loud like He seems to with you. :) Yes, I have lost friends, but because they drifted away from me, not because we argued or anything like that. So, I don’t know. What I do know is that you are a beautiful young woman and you so inspire me, even if I don’t always feel God calling me to believe something the same as you do. :) God has given you this strong spirit for a reason, and one of those reasons is to encourage the weak ones like me to be stronger and speak up more! ;) I so appreciate your posts, even the contradictory ones, because they tug at my heart and make me question and dig into the Word each day to seek out what God truly has to say. :D
May He comfort your heart dear friend and give you the strength to continue to speak out the truth! :) (((HUGS)))
~Rachel~
.-= Rachel´s last blog ..Prayer for a New Car…and a Friend =-.
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But ye are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, an holy nation, a peculiar people; that ye should shew forth the praises of him who hath called you out of darkness into his marvellous light:
10 Which in time past were not a people, but are now the people of God: which had not obtained mercy, but now have obtained mercy.
11 Dearly beloved, I beseech you as strangers and pilgrims, abstain from fleshly lusts, which war against the soul;
12 Having your conversation honest among the Gentiles: that, whereas they speak against you as evildoers, they may by your good works, which they shall behold, glorify God in the day of visitation.
1 Peter 2:9-12 (KJV)
You are not supposed to BE NORMAL. God’s chosen ones are PECULIAR or some might say SPECIAL. For much of my teenage years I pondered what my purpose was on this third rock from the son. I too struggled with why I did not see the world the way NORMAL people did. I wondered why I was so strange and ABNORMAL. Why I was not interested in the things my classmates where. It drove me to much dispair until I came to the knowledge of the truth that I was called from my youth to be set apart for HIS PURPOSES. It is for HIS PURPOSE that I am what I am. So my purpose is to show forth HIS PURPOSE. ON PURPOSE hehehe . :)
Those who walk with the same spirit that you possess will recognize the Spirit of the Lord within you. And those that do not well will not. :)
.-= Allen´s last blog ..Do You Have a Back-up? =-.
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Aw, Jocelyn! Please don’t try to be anyone but YOU! You’re such a wonderful person inside and out and the Lord is clearly working very powerfully in your life. I don’t agree with you on everything, but then I’ve never met anyone who’s ever agreed with me on everything. I know the feeling; it’s tough, and sometimes I really wish I could just blend in with everyone just so that I don’t offend, lose, or turn them off. It’s gets really frustrating, I know, but God didn’t promise an easy walk with Him. What He does promise is that it will be worth it. :)
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Dear Jocelyn,
You are a strong champion for the father.
You encourage others through the Gift of the Spirit.
Thank you for being so transparent in sharing what is on your
heart.
Do not let these worldly friendships be robbers of your joy in our Father.
You can have joy in the midst of trials.
He allows these yielding experiences in our lives so that we grow in moment to moment dependence in him. He is refining you.
Keep praying, persevering and posting.
Your light does shine bright.
Keep being victorious in our Father.
Christie
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Jocelyn,
You are such an impressive young lady, and you are stronger in your convictions to follow Yehovah, than most adults my age. Thank you for sharing your struggle, your pain, and your heart. It truly does touch me.
Many prayers being sent your way.
.-= Stephanie´s last blog ..Changes and a Move! =-.
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Dear Jocelyn,
Probably everyone who is seeking to follow God runs into the same situation at one time or another. But the answer is always the same: Follow Him.
Joh 21:20 Then Peter, turning about, seeth the disciple whom Yeshua loved following; which also leaned on his breast at supper, and said, Lord, which is he that betrayeth thee?
21 Peter seeing him saith to Jesus, Lord, and what shall this man do?
22 Yeshua saith unto him, If I will that he tarry till I come, what is that to thee? follow thou me. (KJV)
Just follow Him. He will take care of the rest.
.-= Dimple´s last blog ..1 Samuel 16: Music and Spirits =-.
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Jocelyn, you are inspirational and so sweet! The way to Paradise is narrow and many cannot tread it – however, you are striving along it, determined to honour Yehovah with your life! Yehovah knows how hard the narrow way is for those Believers who seek to live in the World but not be OF the World, and I pray that He will comfort and strengthen you.
.-= Jade´s last blog ..HELLoween, more like =-.
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Hey, sweetheart. I cannot tell you how much I admire you and hope the best for you because you are who you are. I am in awe of your ability to just “say it”, but not only that, to live it. You have integrity, my dear, something very rare and very special. Hang on to that- I know God has great things in store for you.
.-= Leslie´s last blog ..Co-op Day at Cristina’s and Bob’s =-.
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Jocelyn,
We have been experiencing the same type of thing. We have lost friends and almost lost family because of our beliefs. As Allen stated above, we are NOT supposed to be normal. Normal is the Sunday-Christian who doesn’t even read their own Bible. I know it’s frustrating. I’m in a debate on FB with a guy from my high school and his father-in-law (who is also a pastor) regarding Mark 7 & Acts 10 (combined in the same debate). I have presented biblical Truth AND logic to these men and they refuse to (or can’t) see it. They are looking at the passages with a Greek mindset and refuse to look at them any other way. It’s VERY frustrating to present biblical Truth to someone over and over and over and they argue every which way to Sunday that they are right, even though you are giving them biblical proof to back up your point.
The time is getting short, and those of us who have been called to stand out are standing out more and more in this world. The lines between Christianity and biblical Truth are becoming more defined every day.
Continue to stand out, and know that where there is a loss in your life, YHWH will fill it – whether it be a friendship or other.
Shalom.
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